Anonymous #1 4d

I mean tbh I don’t feel particularly biologically imposed to do that. Is there just something wrong with me?

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Anonymous #1 4d

I appreciate the perspective, though. I definitely agree that technology plays a huge part in this. It feels like men and women (and people in general) are talking past each other for the most part these days

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

hahah its not so literal, its sort of the same way men r more imposed to be the provider and woman the caregiver— not exactly something everyone would say “yes i feel imposed to do this” but often times it naturally falls that way. Men r more likely to be the one to approach, compete, and try to impress if u get what i mean

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Anonymous #3 4d

social skills and relationship building are like muscles that u have to build and maintain. talking to people can be weird and awkward and that is okay it’s not something to be afraid of

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Anonymous #1 4d

I’m 100% with you on the phone thing and the loss of communication skills!! But women are not “biologically caregivers,” nor are men “biologically competitive.” That’s bioessentialist language that upholds patriarchal gender roles. It’s pretty dangerous rhetoric that’s been making a comeback

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Anonymous #4 4d

Thank you for saying what I’m too conflict averse to say lol

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Anonymous #4 4d

Personally I just don’t want to risk making a woman uncomfortable

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

I gotchu lol

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

That’s good and admirable but I feel like a lot of men have overcorrected on this specific front. I mean this in the nicest way possible, but this is a little bit like the gen z version of when boomer men hear about a guy at their office getting fired or called into HR for calling the receptionist Sugar Tits every day for three months and go “Jesus! We can’t even give a complement anymore!”

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Anonymous #4 4d

Like it’s a response rooted more in male anxieties than in what women are actually asking for in order to feel safe

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Anonymous #4 4d

I mean I’d rather overcorrect than undercorrect tbh. When you don’t already know someone it’s difficult to guess how they might feel about being approached or asked out, so for me it makes sense to err on the side of caution

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

At a certain point I think it comes down to the fact that you can’t connect with people without risk. If you’re really that concerned about not creeping someone out you’re almost certainly not going to. I think I’ve also seen a lot of the men in my life use it as an excuse to themselves and others to avoid risking rejection- ultimately I think that’s usually what this is about. Which becomes really frustrating for women because once again, at its core this is a trend that’s about protecting 1/2

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Anonymous #4 4d

Men’s feelings under the guise of concern for women’s safety.

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Anonymous #4 4d

To be clear you seem like a good guy with good intentions! But a lot of the answers u get from men about this, once you scratch below the surface about this, are more about fear of rejection than anything else

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Anonymous #4 4d

I appreciate that you’re giving me the benefit of the doubt, I think it’s a mix of both tbh. I wouldn’t really call it a guise, but I understand why you might be skeptical lol.

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Anonymous #4 4d

sorry i rlly dont follow those types of rhetorics so literally!! but our selectiveness and mens lack there of is very very much just a biologically driven thing even if its less of a black and white picture that follows this idea word for word. We r only born w a set amount of eggs and only able to get pregnant every 9 months while men carry and produce thousands of sperm throughout their life and can reproduce repetitively if desired, this in itself is what i meant by the biological selective-

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Anonymous #4 4d

To your point about the risk, it’s comforting to hear that my mindset might make the situation less uncomfortable, but I’m still concerned when it comes to appearances. I’ve been told by women that I’m friends with that I have a “gentle giant” kind of vibe, but I’ve also been told by my guy friends that I, among other things, “look like I’m planning a siege on 11th century London.”

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Anonymous #1 4d

This isn’t the kind of thing that can be attributed entirely to biology. It’s more of a sociological trend.

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Anonymous #4 4d

-ness. I totally see where ur coming from tho on how the “men provider woman caregiver” is a harmful rhetoric- for reference im a queer woman and am very familiar with my lack of needing a man to survive. Ill admit my mistake on mentioning that part i was using it more as a way of explaining that biological selectiveness isnt gonna be something u so literally *feel*.

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Anonymous #4 4d

My b if this is getting off topic, I just wanted to give some context as to where I’m coming from here

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

of course! my comment doesnt take into consideration culture or psycology or any social aspects (the things that really set us apart from being like any other animal on this earth), but the biological factor is still there despite other factors being at play. There is no doubt that women have a much higher energy expenditure to reproduce compared to men and this along w the desire of a good mate bc of our abnormally long developmental stage as humans are still things deeply ingrained into us for

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Anonymous #1 4d

survival.

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Anonymous sea_taco 4d

Again, not to sound harsh but if your concern is how women see you why would you be worried at all about how male are perceiving you? Trust women and not men when it comes to women’s perspectives.

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