Idk who needs to hear this, but ur not responsible for the crimes committed against u. No matter what u did before, during, or after; u aren’t the one who violated another human being. Just bc ur the one in pain doesn’t mean u did something to deserve it
We only ever tell people they “shouldn’t have partied/gotten drunk” when they just so happened to get attacked while doing so.
Do NOT let this fuckass culture trick you into carrying the responsibility OR shame of your rapists’ own crimes.